I Have ITCHues

Happy Friday to all! There's a serious TGIFF feeling in the air, probably due to Monday's holiday (for some. Sorry if you're not some). Today's outfit is brought to you by the Letter I, for ITCHY. About a year ago my bestie Jen who lives in LA now [sob] and I were on one of our marathon shopping tears. We popped into this badass store in Williamsburg, BK called Concrete + Water. It's one of those superchic stores that make you question whether you belong there or not. While I was pondering this, Jen thrust a super soft, short ivory tank sweater into my hands and said "try this, you'll have it forever!"


The designer is Eleven Six and it's made of 80% Alpaca, 20% silk. Now I have realized at this point in my life that I cannot stand to have anything that is even 1% wool touching my skin AT ALL EVER. I don't understand you people who can wear wool. Are you made of Teflon?? But of course, this tank didn't say wool. It said the aforementioned textiles, and it was baby butt soft. I did sort of wonder if I felt itchy when I had it on, but talked myself out of it and plunked down my credit card on this "investment piece."

I've worn it twice. Why? BECAUSE IT'S F#%KING ITCHY AS F#CK! But I decided to try again today. Since it's short, I wore it with my high-waisted J Brand jeans. Dan took some great pictures that completely hide my tortured itch-face and red blotchiness that resulted from my rabid scratching.

BUT, in the one straight-on picture he took, I discovered yet another ITCHue: This top is unflattering!! It's too short and, even with high waist jeans, the proportions are just not right for me. 

unflattering angle or unflattering top? either way, ADIOS TANK. 

unflattering angle or unflattering top? either way, ADIOS TANK. 

OutFIT or LeaveIT?: She's OUTTAHERE. I'm sups bummed to let her go but also grateful to have 2 reasons now. Itchy AND unflattering? N'thanks, tank. 

Lindsey Kaufman